Setting aside for the moment that I don’t really like the term “crossdresser,” I’d like to set something straight about crossdressing. It’s about gender expression, people – gender identity. It is not about sexual orientation or sexuality. I know in most people’s minds, they have very fixed concepts that all relationships are butch-femme (opposites attract [...]

I’m wading my svelte self into some very murky waters here, but I’ve never been one to shy away from controversy so here goes. The subject of weight, especially the “ideal” weight for women (seemingly to be mandated by everyone and anyone) is fraught with controversy. On the one hand, you have a very fat-phobic [...]

Women are but flowers, requiring tender care and kindest words. They are a separate species, without which we men might perish, but for which we must be strong and deferential, the proverbial knight in shining armour. This belief system is chivalry and it is the most dangerous type of sexism because the behavior pretends to [...]

How does one “come out” as something that doesn’t exist in most people’s eyes? As something that is a vague “in between” state? Everyone knows that there are men and there are women. That’s it – end of story. I could tell everyone that I’m transsexual, a woman born in a man’s body and that [...]

I recently finished watching a TV series (the DVD version, of course) of “TransGeneration” by the Sundance Film Channel. It’s a series about 4 transgender college students who are all at some stage of transsexuality (several on hormones, one completes SRS during the show). I’m not a big fan of “reality” type TV shows, but [...]

Weddings freak me out, on a number of levels. In a society that’s become increasingly permissive for gender expression, they’re a throwback to the strictly enforced gender roles. The men with long hair must cut or contain it and wear suits and the punk women must wear something “feminine” – a dress or nice blouse [...]

When I hit the early teenage years, I was often made fun of for being so “hairless,” and “like a girl” (especially my legs which wore shorts for Track & Cross-country sports). I did have some hair on my legs, but it was fine, sparse and very light blonde, nearly invisible. I didn’t have to [...]

I recently saw an interesting episode of The Boondocks called “Guess ho’s coming to dinner,” where Huey and Riley (the main characters and ostensible children) have a conversation about whether women are “hos” or not. Riley makes a remark about women being hos and Huey counters that not all women are hos. Riley (who often [...]

Once people get to know me and start to figure out my alternative gender status, they often ask about pronouns. What pronoun do I prefer? She or he? Well, that’s really the whole problem isn’t it? There aren’t good gender-neutral singular personal or possessive pronouns in the English language. There is of course “one” as [...]

This week, there was a piece in Savage Love that had to do with differing libidos between men and women and mentioned a book by Joan Sewell which is apparently getting a lot of press called “I’d Rather Eat Chocolate: Learning to Love My Low Libido”. I think some of the advice Dan was giving [...]