diSmart Customer Guarantee & Survey Results
Customer Satisfaction is our highest priority here at diSmart. Our GenDissent pre-millenial headcleaner set is meant to help make people feel safe with the loving standards they grew up with, and of course to make a modest profit. So, now, we present to you, dear customer, the results of our customer survey, here on the web. We were very impressed that our product was already so gratifying, though of course we will incorporate ALL suggestions into future products.
Unveiled and uncensored, our survey results:
(for the original questions, scroll to the bottom of page)
Sex: 2 Hermaphrodite 2 Castrated 34 Other Race: 5 Martian 7 Venusian 1 Vitruvian 15 Human
8 Other 1 Undecided 1 Martian-Human half-breedGender: 11 Multiple 7 None 20 Other Product Performance: 27 numbers 10 symbols 1 unsure Sexual Identity: 15 numbers 13 symbols 1 some 1 none 1 unsure Oral Sex: 19 Spit 17 Swallow 1 Gurgle 1 Guzzle
Comments by the critics:
Anne Marie, a student, says: "very cool concept --> I agree completely with your view on sex & gender. Is there really a difference between male and female?" Laurie, perennial student, says: "Good Job!! Nice Pens!!" Christina, marketing, prefers not to say. Sarah, student, says: "I think next time you should wear the skirt and fishnests to present" __, evil doctor, says: "let me think about it longer" Igor, ASS. PROFESSOR RPI, prefers not to say. Eva, student, says: "gender = society defining us" Meredith, __, says: "The video is really nice; i liked the recurring image of the face submerged in the purple background. The add yr. posting as a write are a nice touch, as is the purple wig" K. B., __, prefers not to say. Curtis, nomad, says: "GREAT JOB LUQ!" Daniel, student, says: "I LOVE YOUR QUESTIONS" BK, there, prefers not to say. M. GLITTERKITTY, KITTYKAT, says: "LUQ IS BEAUTIFUL. S/HE WORKED VERY HARD ON THIS PROJECT + DESERVES TO HAVE PEOPLE CONSIDER + LISTEN. I HAVE LEARNED A LOT FROM THIS PROJECT." Bruce, None yet, says: "Sorry I didn't get this to you sooner. I thought your piece was really good. Good luck with it next semester." __, __, says: "Yes" Michael, student, says: "Performance gets
a 10 for boldness & execution. don't know what constitutes my sexual
identity Fran, Animator/Designer, says: "Pure Genius." Ashwan, ARCHITECT, says: "I cannot figure out these signs. I think I can, but then maybe not!" Mike, Human, prefers not to say. Scott, your Professor, says: "EXCELLENT." __, student, says: "pretty good, but was a bit too busy sound got a bit busy. maybe a bit too much use of mass-media clips." Kim, Nursery School Teacher, says: "Hello!" |
Dr. Rankleshorts, Dr., prefers not to say. __, __, says: "strong video - well edited. liked the repeats and loops. good final images. sound track sticks in your head. very effective" Meghan, student, prefers not to say. Amanda, student, says: Extremely interesting concept, and fun to think about - I like that you challenged all black and white ideas of what gender/sexuality is, while maintaining humor/sarcasm :) Seth, SoundArtist, says cryptically: "Where do you hide all that stuff?" Dina, cat wrangler, prefers not to say. beta, personal stalker, says: "i really liked the soundtrack when i heard it, thought that was the piece, but it's much better w/ the video" John, __, says: "Men are men, women are not men. This is how it has always been." Justin, student, says: "Looks good. When do I see picts on web? Whats the URL"
Damijan, CREATIVE DIRECTOR/3-D ANIMATION PROF., says: "GOOD JOB, LUKE" Brent, perpetual student, prefers not to say. __, __, says: "ARE YOU TRYING TO QUESTION GENDER ROLES AS PORTRAYED BY MASS MEDIA OR ARE YOU MAKING A STATEMENT ABOUT YOUR OWN SEXUALITY"
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Name: __________________ | Address: __________________ | Occupation: __________________ |
Sex: __________________ | Race: __________________ | Gender: __________________ |
Please Rate the Product Performace: 1 - 10 @ # % |
Please Rate Your Own Sexual Identity: 1 - 10 @ # % |
Oral Sex: spit/swallow |
Comments: ______________________________________________________
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Thank you for using diSmart, please consume us again and again and again (like that Pepla-cola you Americans are so fond of).